Month 3 and counting

CAUTION! The following post savors strongly of bitterness and self pity, proceed at your own risk :P

So December 1st marked the third month that I have been following the apparel diet. So far so good! Not to say that I haven't been sorely tempted but budget constraints (damn that mortgage) and the holiday season, rushing towards us like a speeding freight train, made it easier to resist. I won't say it wasn't painful, because it absolutely was, just easier to resist. OK so I didn't resist the Star Wars sweater from H&M, but come on people it was a Star Wars sweater!!

Now Christmas is staring us in the face, giving us that look that says "got you again!". The tree is up and decorated. The house isn't exactly throwing up Christmas, darn that budget again! The gifts have been purchased and wrapped, some hand made even! I find myself with free time. Am I making cookies? Taking my kids to look at Christmas lights? Nay friends, I am instead chained to my computer taunted by my inbox which is brimming with advertisements for the retail sales meant to draw in those last minute shoppers. My brain tells me to resist, but like a moth to a flame I click on link after shinning link browsing the sales.

I haven't bought anything........yet. Laying in bed the other night I actually considered starting a work out routine for the same reason. Hey if I loose weight I will need new clothes! But in the end I decide that I don't have any work out clothes and I am forbidden to buy any so there you have it. ( at this point I would like to point out how sick and wrong it is that I am considering getting healthier ONLY so I can buy new clothes) Today I have been pounding the Almond Joys in what I am convinced is a subconscious attempt to put ON weight so I will have to buy new clothes. I should probably seek some sort of professional help :P

I find myself hoping that I am getting gift cards for Christmas.

Long overdue

Hello blog followers!!
(all 8 of you) It's been a while, no? My life has been a crazy whirlwind. Some things welcome, some MOST unpleasant. It's time to grow as a person again and that is never a comfortable situation.
In the beginning of November my best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. I can not even tell you how hard I cried when she called me to tell me the news.
Sense then as crazy as my life has been hers has been an absolute whirl of doctors appointments and phone calls to the insurance company. Settling things at work and spending as much time with her kids as humanly possible. All culminating in the grand finally of a double mastectomy on November 30th. She is home now, resting and for the moment cancer free. She will need chemo after the first of the year but for now is enjoying the holidays with her family.
I think the hardest part for me is wading through all the new emotions swirling through my brain. My heart breaks for her and her husband and her kids. I am not fearful for her life, her doctors have made it clear that her prognosis is good. But I am scared for the physical and emotional changes that she will have to endure. I am scared that I can't be enough help. I am worried I will be forced to be useless. I can't go through cancer with her, the surgery or the chemo. I am left standing on the sidelines chasing after her shouting all the things I can do.
After all those thoughts have burned through my brain come the guilt. What are my woes compared with hers? She has cancer for Christs sake! What's happening in my life that is anywhere near as bad as that? How dare I worry about not being enough help in that face of what she is going through.
I am worried about this cold that is kicking my butt, will I get the kids cakes done in time? Will be house be clean for the party? Or will I still have laundry strewn on my bedroom floor with the door quietly shut. Retail therapy has NEVER looked more inviting then it does right now. Ahh well c'est la vie.

Thus far a success, though barely......

Today is a grayish and gloomy Monday morning. As I type these words I am proud to announce that my dishes are done!

No but really as I begin the third month of my "apparel diet" I admit with a smidgen of pride that I haven't broken my diet. That being said it has been MUCH harder then I expected, and even at times a little depressing. At every turn I am confronted with things that I would like to add to my wardrobe.

Shopping for everyday household items has become a full scale assault on my willpower. This is probably because we do SO much of our shopping at Target, but hey, stuff is cheap there. As I stand there, possible apparel purchase in hand, a sea of thoughts and emotions crash over me. The first thought is always "is it really cheating, who would know?". Followed immediately by a wave of guilt and shame that is always successful in making me put the item back. I walk away and the thoughts continue to swirl in my brain, a tangled knot like so much yarn after a kitten. I pick up a thread and try to examine it.

"Why can't you put your family first? Is having pretty things so much more important then keeping your family on budget?"

Of course not.

"Then why is your wardrobe so important?"

I want to look nice! I don't want anyone thinking I am a slob.

"So that is the answer, your vanity and pride come before the needs of your family"

NO! That's not what I said! It's not wrong for me to want to look presentable!

"Your current wardrobe is more then sufficient to accomplish that goal."

I know it is.....but.....

"But what?"

I don't know.

And that's as far as I ever get in unraveling my obsession with clothes. Phaw, maybe I need therapy. I mean who feels this way about clothes and shoes, coats and scarves. Have you ever seen confessions of a shopaholic? You know the opening scene when she is talking about how she feels about stores and shopping? Yep that's me, that's exactly how I feel. Thank the good Lord I have enough restraint not to go THAT nuts :P

I have to say that when I started this I had no idea how deeply this would affect me. I really started this thinking" eh, one year I can do it no sweat!"Maybe I was in denial of how much my clothes really meant to me. BTW I did watch all the Spring 2011 ready to wear shows on Style.com I couldn't help myself. I did stop reading Vogue and Nylon, that just makes me want to buy stuff.

At the end of the day I don't feel liberated, I just feel sad. I miss new things. I am jealous of my friends and family when they go shopping. Even before my diet I didn't need to buy anything, just the act of shopping with friends made me happy. Maybe a better choice for me would have been to reexamine how and why I shop, as opposed to going cold turkey. But given the thoughts and emotions my diet has brought out, maybe this was what I needed after all......

one week down, 51 more to go......

I have made it seven days without buying one thing for myself!!! Man it was a lot harder then I thought it would be, temptation is everywhere. Even Daden's choir practice is only 5 blocks from both Urban Outfitters, and Anthropology my two favorite stores. Not to mention this really cool inexpensive jewelry store that I have heard raves about. I didn't even get to go there before my diet started :( *sniff*

But in some cases I surprised even myself. For instance today, as I was shopping at Target for some upcoming birthday parties (yeah, they are tomorrow, that's how I roll) I remembered that Erin and I had decided to wear black long sleeve shirts under our Halloween costumes. I don't own a black long sleeve. So I immediately changed directions and headed to the apparel section. As I stood there $10 t-shirt in hand two thoughts floated through my head:

"Hey it's only $10! And it's for my Halloween costume so it's not really cheating right?"

"I don't need this! I won't ever wear it again, I never wear long sleeved tees. I should just borrow one from my sisters."

I am extremely proud to report that the latter though won out and I left Target without a black long sleeve tee! I was a little shocked at how quickly my brain said "hey it's only $10 bucks, and you need it!" When really, I don't need it. I have NO need for it at all! I am hoping that in this year I can retrain my brain. No more wasting money on stuff I don't need!

It's going to be a long 51 weeks........

Do I need to go on a diet?

So I have been hearing about it more and more. The newest thing in diets. It grabs my attention every time, and I am forced to mull it over in my brain. And every time I come to the same conclusion. I think I need to diet.

It's called The Great American Apparel Diet. You can read about here: http://www.thegreatamericanappareldiet.com/

Basically it means no buying for one year. Nothing. No new purses, coats, cardigans, jeans, or shoes. Most people are excluding socks and undergarments. I mean you pretty much can't go with out those if they honestly need replacing. There are as many reasons for joining the movement as there are people in it. Some wish to reduce their carbon foot print by consuming less. Others wish to get their budget in check. Some are in protest of the gluttony of consumerism that has gripped the world today. Each reason is personal, each is valid.

But why does this intrigue me so? Is it the challenge? My husband thinks I can't do it, and I admit that part of me is scared that he is right. Which opens a new train of thought: am I so obsessed with my wardrobe that i can't go a year with out buying something new? It's not like I don't have enough to last me a year, far from it. The idea has spurred me to take an honest inventory of my closet. I have included it here:

T shirts: 44

Sweatshirts: 27

Jeans: 21

Pants: 4

Skirts: 18

Shirts: 45

Jackets: 27

Coats: 4

Scarves: 20

Shoes: 46

Tank tops (layering): 18

Sweaters: 22

Shorts: 12

Dresses: 26

Purses: 5

I think I can make it. Who's with me?

What a long strange......

OK I know it's not exactly an original title, so shoot me.

Where did September come from? Didn't June just start?
Oh well, I suppose it's here and it's time for me to reflect on the summer's happenings through a lens of nostalgia. Everything looks cuter with a lens of nostalgia over it, you should try it sometime.
I have already covered June's shenanigans in a previous post so we will skip that.

July was awesome :) bbq at the McPhersons house for the fourth. For which I made a totally unsuccessful attempt at butting the Alliance Lion insignia on a cake. Oh well at least the cake was tasty! And we can't forget the Portland Beer Festival with our guildies, that was epic :) Daden's choir had the opportunity to sing the national anthem for a Portland Beavers game. I was so proud of my little man I fully admit to tearing up while watching him sing. I have included a video of Daden's choir at the bottom of this post. Just cause they are so dang cute.

I finally found a weekend in August to hold a housewarming party! Words can not describe how excited I was to be throwing an actual housewarming party. In my own house, which I suppose goes without saying. I spent a week scrubbing every surface in my house in preparation, saving the floor for the very last. Yeah it never got done, oh well! Alexa came over the night before to help me make cupcakes. We did more talking then baking :P
So the day we picked turned out to be one of the hottest days of the summer. No problem, we have AC. Well, we have AC as long a the power doesn't go out! Just as the first guests where arriving, the power went out!! Eric was furious! The first thing he did was look at me and demand to know if I had remembered to pay PGE! Oh well, he's not so much of a "roll with the punches" kinda guy!
With the power back on Deb helped me to make my first successful batch of merange to frost what are now my very favorite cupcakes. Lemon merange, email me I will give you the recipe, seriously they are amazing. The day flew by in a flurry of visitors and food. I had so much fun I wish that I could do it all over again.
Late August brought our only camping trip of the summer. Family camp with the fine folks from Living Hope Baptist Church. I love camping, I am determined to do more camping next summer. I got the scoop on an excellent camp ground from some friends........

So really that's it. In those few events our summer is over. A fabulous summer filled with people I love, I am astounded by how quickly it passed. So many changes have happened already! Daden started school at East Orient, Tessa started gymnastics and her last year of preschool. Before I know it all my babies will be grown up......sniff......but that's another blog.

Taking care of business

Ok I am trying really hard not to be negative, but atm I am wondering why I even have health insurance. Here we are in August and to date Lifewise have paid NOTHING. Not one cent towards my families medical expenses. And this has been an expensive year! Every time I turn around one of my kids is sick. I fell terrible but I am starting to weigh how sick they are vs the cost of taking them to the doctor! By the time we meet our deductible, it will be time for it to reset!

Eric and I haven't been able to pay for some of the things that we really need because we have been using that money to pay the kids medical bills. Eric and I both need new glasses. I need dental work BADLY. But it's not going to happen, at least not this year. I still need to take Daden and Tessa in for their annual exams in December. Here's hoping that they don't get sick between now and then!

THIS IS JUST WRONG!!!!

The 30th year

Today is day 26 of my 30th year on this planet. It feels a lot like day 26 of my twentieth year.
I am doing a lot more laundry, and toilet scrubbing then I did when I was twenty.....hmmmm
I find myself looking forward to different things in the next decade. Before we get halfway through all three of my kids will be in school full time. Before I turn forty Daden and Tessa will both be in high school. Finally getting all the boxes unpacked, which may take the entire decade. Celebrating birthdays and holidays in our new house.
This year ( I mean my 30th year, not calendar year) I want to focus on being thankful. Truly thankful. I counted down the weeks to Thanksgiving last year by choosing something that I was thankful for as my facebook status everyday. The first few days, even the first week it was simple to come up with things to be thankful for. I was shocked at how quickly it became a struggle for me to find something to be thankful for. My life is so blessed, I couldn't believe that it was so difficult. I think that it is so easy for me to fall into the daily routine, and to become disenchanted with the things that may be unpleasant, but are really blessings.
So this week I focused on laundry. I was thankful that at least I had a washer and dryer in my house and didn't have to go to a laundry mat. My friend Jolie pointed out something I didn't even think of! Lots of laundry means I have lots of clothes to wear! Two blessings in something I don't like :D
If this keeps up, I may lose count! I can live with that :)

Out of the box: a moving story

Most of you know that Eric and I recently bought our first home. We are over the moon for our little place. The last time I moved, I was ten years old. Moving into Eric's house doesn't count, that was just a carload of stuff. Well, maybe two I have always had a lot of clothes! I was unprepared for just how much work moving would actually be!
I am SO blessed to have such an amazing circle of family and friends. I am at a loss for words how to adequately thank all the people who helped make this possible for us. So many people helped in so many ways I can't hope list them all. Eric's parents and the money they gifted to us for the down payment. To my parents for giving up their Saturdays to go look at houses with us, or watch the kids so we could go. My sisters for watching the kids and helping me pack. My friends for helping gather boxes, load trucks, and make CDs of 80s music.

(*note* this turned out to be CRAZY long. I will give anyone who reads the whole thing a gold star LOL)

Wednesday June 16th: We receive an email telling us that we will sign paperwork tomorrow and get our keys on Friday. Adrenalin starts pumping and I kick into packing overdrive. Poor Tessa looses her room to stacks of boxes. At 8PM we receive another email saying that the paperwork never made it to the title company but that hopefully it would get there Thursday morning and we could sign that afternoon. But we won't get our keys till Monday. My spirits drop. We have lost another weekend that we won't be able to use to move. I go to bed feeling a little defeated, but still secretly hopeful that a miracle will happen and we will get our keys on Friday.

Thursday June 17th: Eric heads off to work and promises that he will call me the second he hears anything about what time we will sign. I drag myself out of bed, make coffee, get the kids their breakfast and them settle them in front of some cartoons. I start packing again, still a little defeated, but trying to get everything done just in case. But I can't concentrate on packing.
Eric calls around ten to tell me that we will be signing at three. I bundle the kids into the car and head for my moms. My stomach is in knots, I am excited and nervous. The kids are bonkers because I have promised them McDonalds for lunch.
Eric meets me at moms and she arrives home from work just in time for Eric and I to run out the door to the title company. In rout we get a call from the escrow agent telling us the exact amount we will need to bring to closing and we make a detour to the bank. We get to the bank and the lovely teller informs us that we don't have $16,000 in our checking account. Now I should point out that Eric deposited the gift check four days prior to this and we have already faxed the title company proof that the check cleared his mothers account. So there should be NO reason for the money not to be there. My heart stops beating while Eric and the teller sort it out. Turns out that when he deposited the check they accidentally put it in Eric's account instead of our joint account. No problem. My heart starts beating again.
We make it to the title company without further incident and proceed to sign what I swear it the largest stack of papers I have EVER seen. Everything moves smoothly and we sign the last paper and I hand over the largest check I have ever written. It's over. It is strangely anti-climatic. We go back to my moms and get the kids.

Friday June 18th: Friday dawns chilly and gray. Eric is able to take the day off to help me pack the rest of the house. We are still holding out a little hope that we might get the keys today. Packing starts again and the sun comes out. The kids head outside. Just after lunch I get a phone call from the title officer saying that they need three more proofs of identification from me........OK. She rattles off a list of acceptable ID choices and we decide on the registration for the van, my Lifewise health card, and my auto insurance card. I scan them and email the document to her. Thirty minutes later I get and email from Debbie asking for proof that our earnest money check cleared. You know the one they cashed a month ago. So I run out to the bank and they print me out proof that the check cleared, but the won't fax it. So I run back home, scan it and email it. We will not be getting the keys today.
Eric's parents offer to take the kids over night and we accept. We spend a quiet night packing.

Saturday June 19th: Grey and cold again, but packing will have to wait. This morning I am off for a much deserved pedicure and after that we will have lunch with Jim and Deb at Sonic. YUM :D After lunch we wander around Ikea and talk about what we will want and need for the new house. But it's pretty pointless because we don't have any measurements. We do pick up an awesome light for the boys room.
The kids come home while I am out getting my hair done. Tessa is still awake when I come home she feels warm to me. Her temp is 100.5 she is excited because sick people get to sleep with mommy.

Sunday June 20th: Nothing big. No church because Tessa is up to 101.5 now. I spend the whole day cuddling her on the couch.

Monday June 21st: Keys today and it's Gramma day!! Eric heads off to work to get some stuff done until it's time to get our keys. Tessa is still red hot but you can't postpone Gramma day for a little thing like a fever. So we motrin her up and head over. Bonus! Gramma says we are going to the Salem Humane Society to get Danielle's new kitten. Who doesn't love a fuzzy kitten? I load the car seats into moms car, we turn on a movie and drive to Salem. The kids love looking at all the animals but the novelty wears off pretty quickly so I take them back to the car to finish their movie while mom fills out the paperwork for the kitten. Did I say kitten? I meant kittens! Apparently they were having a buy one get one free deal. So of course mom got two!
On the way back from Salem Tessa's fever spikes and she is miserable. I begin to regret taking her out of the house. Back at Gramma's house her temp is 104.8 we go home.
Eric meets our realtor at the new house and get the keys. No dinner at the new house, Tessa is too sick.

Tuesday June 22nd: Tessa is still sick. She has been sleeping in my bed sense Saturday night which means that I have been getting ZERO sleep. But today is painting day so I make coffee and push through. Danielle has agreed to babysit the kiddos today while Eric and I paint at the new house. I am praying that Tessa will be OK without me.
We manage to get one coat of paint on the boys room before mom calls to tell me that Tessa is at 104.5 and she needs her mommy. I leave Eric at the new house and go hold our sick baby. I call the doctor, we schedule an appointment for Tessa the next morning.

Wednesday June 23rd: Tessa still sick. At least the sun has made and appearance. Eric heads back to the new house to work on painting. It is killing me that I can't be there to help. I have grand plans for painting clouds and hills and other awesomeness. Instead I drag all three kids to the doctors office. I manage to persuade Tessa to provide a urine sample while keeping Ryder from running all over the office and listening to Daden complain that there is no way that he is going to watch his sister pee in a cup "that's SO GROSS mom!". He waits outside the bathroom. Tessa cries cause she doesn't want to do it and Ryder tries repeatedly to flush the toilet.
Back in the exam room Tessa drops her popsicle and all hell breaks loose. But the good/bad news is that she doesn't have a bladder infection so we just have to "wait it out". I will bring her back on Friday if she is still running a fever.
We stop at 7-eleven for surpees on the way home. I take my daily 3:30 phone call from Erin and she reminds me that I need to take time out to plan my birthday party which is scheduled for Saturday. At this point I really don't see how that's going to happen, but Erin promises to help me. Tessa is still screaming her head off over the lost popsicle and I can barely hear Erin so we say goodbye and I promise to let Erin know if I need help. Tessa finally falls asleep, and Eric comes home. I am completely exhausted at this point. Tessa and I crawl into bed and I prepare for another night of no sleep.

Thursday June 24th: The last day of my twenties dawns sunny and clear. It's moving day! Tessa is still sick and I am still exhausted. I am trying to be excited, tonight we are going to sleep in the new house! But I am so tired and there is still so much work to be done. Eric is tired too and we can't help but be cranky at each other. Instead of excited I just feel overwhelmed.
Danielle comes over and I take Eric to pick up the U-Haul. We do our best to load the truck but it is slow going with the kids. Andrew arrives with his kiddos and between him and Eric they get all the big stuff on the truck. My mom comes to pick up the kids, Danielle leaves for work, and Andrew takes his kids home to have dinner with Erin. Eric and I load the last of what we can fit in the truck and head to the new house. I am dreading unloading the truck.
With the help of our fantastic new neighbors we get the truck unloaded. My mom and dad bring the kids home and we put everyone to bed in their new rooms.
It's quiet and I wander around our house. It doesn't feel real. I am surrounded by boxes and bags, furniture in random places. We have no Internet and no TV, there is no food in the fridge. I feel strange and cut off. I try to feel excited but only feel tired instead. My muscles ache and my brain is fuzzy, time for bed.

Friday June 25th my thirtieth birthday: I am awakened by children bouncing on me. Today I am thirty. Tessa is still running a fever, so I call the doctor. We have an appointment to see them at 10:30. Eric and I are so exhausted we are only making attempts to be patient with each other. Happy birthday to me.
We take the U-Haul back and while the I wait with the kids in the car Daden throws up on himself. I clean him up as best I can, we get him one of my pajama shirts that was left at the old house and go out to breakfast. I try to enjoy my birthday breakfast, but Eric is yelling at the kids and complaining about the food. Tessa is cranky and doesn't want to eat. I give up.
Eric takes the boys and heads back to the old house to get another load and I take Tessa to her doctor appointment. The good news is that her temp is down, 100.5 without meds. We repeat the urine culture and this time he takes a throat culture to test for strep. Both are negative. We have to wait it out. I confess to the doctor that I have a big party planned for the next day...is Tessa still contagious? He shrugs and tells me what I don't want to hear. I feel like crying.
Back at the house Eric offers to stay home with Tessa so I can have my party anyway. I shout at him that I will not have a party with out my whole family. He is trying to help but I am upset and irrational. I take Tessa and Daden to the party store. Big mistake.
At the party store Daden and Tessa are whiny and naughty. I get my 3:30 phone call from Erin. She tries to make me feel better too...but it doesn't help. On the way to my mom's from the party store I do cry, all the way there. I drop off the party stuff and my mom tries to make me feels better. She is only mildly more successful then Erin. I cry some more. I am so tired, I can't make a decision to save my life. I want to have my party, but I am afraid no one will come because Tessa is sick.
Eric calls to tell me that his parents are going to take the kids overnight. That does make me feel better. Tessa is down to 99.8 with no meds. I decided she can stay overnight. That and I am desperate for a night of uninterrupted sleep. We drop off the kids and I request a trip to Ikea. Retail therapy is the best! Eric agrees. I decided to take my mom up on her offer and arrange dinner at Red Robin for later that evening. Ikea is awesome, I decided on a desk, we pick a ceiling light for Tessa's room. Eric lets me buy a new teapot. Dinner with my family is just what the Dr ordered. I relax and have fun. I decided to go ahead with my party anyway, bring your kids at your risk. Alexa promises to make me cupcakes.
That night I go to sleep in my new house, looking forward to my birthday party. Happy, content, loved.

*insert Jeopardy theme song here*

So here we go again...
Eric and I went to look at what feels like the umpteenth house this afternoon. It was beautiful, clean, in a nice neighborhood with good schools. Yard not to big and not too small with a cute little patio and it even had a swing set for the minions. Just what we have been looking for!

However this will be the fourth, that's right, FOURTH house we have put an offer on in this exhaustive year long house hunting journey. So you'll pardon me if I don't seem all that excited. Honestly I am scared to! I am afraid that this will turn out like all the rest.

And as if I wasn't suffering enough anxiety over this whole process...my printer ran out of ink as I was printing the last two pages of the sales agreement so I can't submit our offer until tomorrow morning! Grrr!!!! Not that it really makes that much of a difference, I mean at 9 at night how many other people are making offers. But still.....it would be my luck.

I know that God has a will and a way. So here I sit, waiting not so patiently for my life to change forever. Praying that this is the house God has planned for us.

A woman torn..

Those of you who know me, are well acquainted with my need to do everything. Normally I manage to limit what I actually end up doing (edit from her husband, she doesn't limit herself that much) so that I don't go totally crazy. But lately I find myself with FAR too much to do. Or should say, far too much that I want to do.

• I want to finish my first quilt, however I waited to long to buy the fabric for the binding and the backing and now none of my local fabric stores carry the fabric any more. Oh and going to multiple fabric stores to try to find the fabric I need only made my problems worse by opening my eyes to even more projects for me to attempt.
• I need to finish Tessa's Christmas stocking. She is approaching her 5Th Christmas with no stocking of her own. See my mom started this tradition of sewing these adorable stitched felt applique stockings. They are all cute and "happy hands at home" so of course I needed to continued the tradition.
• I found a whole bunch of new crochet patterns that I am dying to try.
• Don't even get me started on how many things I want to sew. Anyone need an apron? They are kinda my current obsession.
• I need to take the puppy to puppy school. He finally made it to the vet to get his last puppy shots so I should probably get him signed up now.
• I am a not so closet video game nut. I have a WoW Cataclysm bucket list that needs crossing off. Just got Loremaster Eastern Kingdoms last night, woot!
• I want to make more cakes. This is a new hobby for me, one that I LOVE. But they take up a massive amount of my available resources, it is amazingly hard to decorate a cake while dodging my minions.
• Ah the minions! Summer is here and it is my first full summer break as a stay at the home mom. It goes without saying that I am beyond excited! There are so many things I want to do with my kids! Trips to the beach, the park, the zoo. Playing in the sprinkler, making Popsicles. Teaching Daden to ride his bike with no training wheels. Going on Ryders first camping trip!

Does anyone else have this problem, or is it just me? So how do you do it? How do you do everything on your list and still stay sane? Thoughts? Where to draw the line, how to prioritize?

Family first, of course. But all that other crap? I have no idea. Maybe I can stop sleeping at night. Somewhere in there I should probably make some time for exercise.......nah!

:D

First Blog EVER

So I have been thinking about writing a blog for a really long time. I have given it tons of though, way more thought then it deserves in fact.
Some reasons not to;
a: what would I write about?
b: Do I really have anything to say that is worthy of posting?
c: Does anyone really care?

In the end I decided that;
a: I talk so much that I should have no trouble finding something to write about
b: I don't really care whether or not it's a worthy piece of writing. It's my blog I'll write what I want.
c: I don't care if you don't care.
d: I want to so nah!

And so here I am now, typing my very first blog, and here you are now reading it. Mwah ha ha ha ha!